Love Thy Neighbor…

Lev. 19:18

   Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: I am the Lord.

Matt. 19:19

   Honour thy father and thy mother: and, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.

     Love thy neighbor as thyself. Love can be and is usually defined as either 1. a strong emotional liking for another 2. sexual intercourse. It is not uncommon in this day and age to hear of men beating on their wives so in this instance they are NOT loving their neighbor, who in this case is their wife, as they love themselves because the men are NOT beating on themselves like they beat on their wives.

   Love thy neighbor as thyself translates as “Love thy neighbor the same way that you love yourself. For example, if you don’t beat on yourself then you don’t beat on others. If you don’t burn you at the stake then you don’t burn others at the stake.

   Given the varying definitions of “love,” Love thy neighbor as thyself can also be translated to mean that you need to go fuck yourself because you’re trying to fuck your neighbor. You need to go masturbate yourself because you’re trying to masturbate your neighbor. You need to go rape yourself because you’re trying to rape your neighbor. You may not be calling it rape but this doesn’t mean that you’re not trying to rape another.

   There are ways that you can go fuck yourself, such as: sticking a dildo and/or vibrator up your own anus. Dildos/vibrators are not that expensive or difficult to purchase.

   Do you eat well while your neighbor doesn’t? You’re not loving your neighbor as yourself. Are you planning on killing your neighbor? You’re not loving your neighbor as yourself. Do you expect to marry someone in exchange for a measly peanut butter sandwich? Have you charged yourself a wedding to yourself (have you married yourself) yet because you slapped yourself together a measly peanut butter sandwich? Peanut butter sandwiches are not an equal trade for a wedding, regardless of how “horny” you are.

   Are you planning on spending your neighbor’s hard earned money by falsely claiming that they want to marry you? You need to go get a job and wed yourself to yourself and only to yourself. Do you naively expect everyone to be your bitch/whore? You need to be your own bitch/whore. You need to be your neighbor’s bitch/whore. That is how you love your neighbor as thyself. Some of you need lots of practice so you’d better get busy.

    Do you expect someone to be your slave? You need to be a slave to them for just as long then. Do you naively expect someone to suck your cock (penis)? You need to suck theirs for just as long then. Do you expect someone to lick your anus? You need to lick theirs just as long then. Do you expect someone else to let you order them about? You need to let them order you about the same way for just as long. Do you expect someone else to feed you? You feed them for just as long then. Love thy neighbor as thyself. Now you’re finally learning how.

   If you kill your neighbor then you must consider your own life forfeit. Love thy neighbor as thyself. If you take your neighbor’s property then you give them your property. If they’re poor and you’re not then you’ll be out more by your own choice. If you want to spread idle gossip about your neighbor then you need to spread some about your naïve self. If you’re going to ruin someone else’s reputation then you need to ruin your own. I don’t have a reputation.

   If you disallow gay (homosexual) marriages then you need to disallow all forms of marriage. If you cast a member of your family out and tell them that they’re no longer family then you need to cast yourself out and tell yourself that you’re no longer family. If you excommunicate someone else then you need to excommunicate yourself. If you disallow homosexuality then you need to disallow all forms of sexuality. If you disallow sexuality then you need to disallow something that you like to do (like everything).

   If you want to invalidate the above interpretation of “Love thy neighbor as thyself” then you need to invalidate your own interpretation of “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” If you say that someone else is wrong then you must say that you’re wrong. You either say that your neighbor is right or everybody’s wrong.

   If you want to make the rules that others live by then they get to make the rules that you live by. If you manage someone else’s affairs then they get to manage yours. If you want to wear the pants in my household then I get to wear the pants in yours. If you want to call someone else an hypocrite then you’d better be calling yourself one because that is what you are. If you’re calling someone else a fool then you’d better be calling yourself one because that’s what you are.

    If you keep someone else from being happy then be sure that you don’t let you be happy. If you’re trying to get someone else killed then be sure that you try to get you killed; otherwise you’re not loving thy neighbor as thyself. If you accuse someone else of incest then also accuse yourself.

   Don’t expect someone else to change their name to the weird name of your choosing unless you’re also going to change your name to the same weird name you chose for them. Don’t expect others to live a lie just because you are. Don’t expect someone else to tolerate your naïve bullshit unless you’re prepared to tolerate it the same way they are. Don’t expect someone else to marry the person of your choosing unless you’re prepared to marry the person that you want them to marry.

   My family is creepier than a bug under a rock and so are some of you. I’ve been accused of looking somewhat creepy but obviously, you’ve never looked at yourselves in a mirror. Somebody once told me that I look “creepy” and I had to take it as a compliment because I finally knew that I had my own style.

  I occasionally (seldom) look in a mirror but I don’t see “creepy” when I look there. I see weariness. I see loneliness. I don’t see “creepy.” I’m actually trying to look “creepy” but I never seem to make it. I’m trying hard to be unique instead of like a sheep. Many people dislike it when somebody else looks “creepy” but they never notice how “creepy” they look. Most of the people who call me “creepy” look really creepy themselves. Go figure. At least I don’t usually look like a surprised deer caught in the glare of headlights.

Author: F. Holiday